Comedian

'Ambulatory' is my favorite word to use because it never gets a laugh.

Why did God have to make Mo'Nique a good actress? What was God thinking when he decided to give Mo'Nique acting chops. Now we have to endure Mo'Nique comedy specials.

There are so many people who just want a flashy object in front of their eyes and don't want to think at all; I find that disturbing.

I don't know what Tracy Morgan does onstage, but I can assure you, it's no act.

I would like Albert Brooks to have received the Oscars for best actor, best director and best screenplay for 'Modern Romance.' I love that movie.

In the '90s, comedy was at a very low point, but these days, you've got people like Hannibal Burress, Ron Funches, Maria Bamford - people who can play any club, anywhere.

My goal is to be exactly how I am offstage - although I realize I'm supposed to punctuate it with jokes.

Nobody gets excited when they see me. If I put on my wizard outfit and walk around the airport for a couple of hours, I get a couple of puzzled glances.

I sold door to door for a couple years. As the years recede from the event, I remember less about it, which is probably good for my mind. It was home improvement in Cerritos California, Buena Park, that area.

You tell me that 'Date Night' was good? I'm not going to see it. I will debate you on it, having no knowledge of the footage in the film. I was next to someone on the plane watching it, and they were dozing off.

Most of the people in my family were pretty funny. Everyone had a good sense of humor. I came to California right after college, wanting to be a musician.

'The Graduate' should have won best picture over 'In the Heat of the Night.'

I will say that I wasn't susceptible to Tony Robbins-like pitches, even as a younger man.

I'm tired of demographic appeal being more important than talent. I want to fight against that.

I've given myself permission to say whatever's on my mind when I'm on stage.

I'm still doing what I've always wanted to do, and how big it gets or how much money I make for it or how popular I am in the public's eye is really not that important, even though it's hard to let that go.

If everything was good, maybe I wouldn't have a career. I wouldn't have anything to make fun of.

I came out to L.A. in '78 to be a musician. I didn't get into comedy until the mid-Eighties.

I wanted to like 'Up in the Air' - I like Jason Reitman - but Vera Farmiga left me cold.

I'm not a confrontational person in real life, so I really don't wanna get into arguments or fistfights with people I'm making fun of.