Comedian

First you forget names, then you forget faces. Next you forget to pull your zipper up and finally, you forget to pull it down.

Sayang sekali semua orang yang tahu bagaimana menjalankan negara sibuk mengemudi taksi dan memotong rambut.

Kebahagiaan adalah memiliki kasih sayang, kepedulian, akrab dengan keluarga di kota lain.

Jangan tinggal di tempat tidur .... kecuali Anda dapat menghasilkan uang di tempat tidur.

The most important thing in acting is honesty. If you can fake that, you've got it made.

If it's a good script I'll do it. And if it's a bad script, and they pay me enough, I'll do it.

I spent a year in that town, one Sunday.

Bagi saya umur tidak berarti apa-apa. Saya tidak bisa menjadi tua; Saya sedang bekerja. Saya sudah tua ketika saya berusia dua puluh satu dan keluar dari pekerjaan. Selama Anda bekerja, Anda tetap muda. Ketika saya berada di depan audiensi, semua cinta dan vitalitas menyapu saya dan saya melupakan usia saya.

You know you're getting old when you stoop to tie your shoelaces and wonder what else you could do while you're down there.

Too bad all the people who know how to run this country are busy running taxicabs or cutting hair.

Don't stay in bed, unless you can make money in bed.

Be quick to learn and wise to know.

I would go out with women my age, but there are no women my age.

At my age flowers scare me.

I'd rather be a failure at something I love than a success at something I hate.

I honestly think it is better to be a failure at something you love than to be a success at something you hate.

Acting is all about honesty. If you can fake that, you've got it made.

Aku dinikahkan oleh seorang hakim. Seharusnya aku bertanya pada juri.

I smoke ten to fifteen cigars a day. At my age I have to hold on to something.

It takes only one drink to get me drunk. The trouble is, I can't remember if it's the thirteenth or the fourteenth.