Comedian

I also want to return to doing stand-up. I've become frightened of live audiences. This is a really telling sign that I need to go back on the comedy circuit again.

I get obsessed with decorations and decorating the house. I keep it tasteful outside, but when you get inside it is a bit like Blackpool illuminations, I go bonkers!

I've been offered all the reality TV shows but have turned them down. If I did it as 'Johnny,' there'd be no jungle left! It was really hard regaining control of myself, so I am reluctant to let 'Johnny' back out of the box.

Health-wise, I couldn't have said what my life expectancy would've been if I'd just carried on doing solid blocks of stand-up.

Oh, I'm terrible at travel.

I struggle as a writer, and I'm convinced that if I was at school now, I'd be termed as having ADS. Two minutes and I'm drifting.

I've been offered all the reality TV shows but have turned them down. If I did it as 'Johnny,' there'd be no jungle left! It was really hard regaining control of myself, so I am reluctant to let 'Johnny' back out of the box.

You can't be a proper comic unless you've been out on stage and felt the fear.

My first holiday to San Francisco in 1998-99 was supposed to be a two-week vacation but I ended up staying five weeks and nearly didn't come home.

I avoid any kind of organised trips as that's one of my bugbears.

I always say that the stand-up world is the arena of the unwell, and it is.

My forte is playing drunks down the ages. When my agent rings me about a role, I don't ask what the part is, but what century it's in.

It is easy for me to love myself, but for ladies to do it is another question altogether.

I use very few muscles at the best of times.

Class still matters in Britain today.

My name is Michael Pennington, and I am not a comic character.

I've spent lots of time in London, I studied in London, I like London. It's just not my home.

It's lovely being a parent and being in a strong marriage with somebody who is your best friend.

If you write, produce and direct, you own things and see them through to the end.

I've got too much respect for stand-ups to call myself one.