When I was setting out as a kid, five, six, seven years old, England was a dream. One of my best days as a player was my England debut - but it didn't quite happen after that!
Outside you get credit and praise and it makes you feel good, puts a spring in your step, but really the ceiling was the manager. If I was playing at Old Trafford and felt as though I was contributing and winning things, that was enough for me.
I think with England, I look at myself and accept that I didn't do well enough; then, other times, I was playing my best football for United and England didn't happen.
When I left West Ham in 2004 there was a chance of them signing me instead of Spurs, but it isn't something I think about too often. I've been spoilt during my career.
I do try to stay involved in training and keep that routine as much as I can. I just feel I need to do it for myself, not because the manager demands it, but because you get to a stage where you have to manage yourself - what suits you; what doesn't.
I think bravery is to get on the ball and be bold enough and confident enough to try things when everyone is looking at you and the pressure is on and people are expecting you to win.
I'm doing things in Manchester with the Trafford Sports Park in partnership with the Manchester United foundation and I'm also doing things in Newcastle as well. It's something I'm passionate about.
Certainly every manager I've played under you take things from them. That's just part of gaining all that knowledge over the years. Some good, some not so good, but it's all part of the process.
The 2006 World Cup was the summer I came to United so the England thing was kind of ongoing. Getting to the World Cup was massive but it wasn't until I got to United that I had that feeling that winning was a possibility.
It's always been the ones that got away that stick in your memory. You use them for motivation. The ones you win are brilliant and you enjoy them, and then you move on.
As a coach or manager, if it was something that had to be done I'd be comfortable doing it but I'd still be true to myself. I wouldn't turn into a madman or start throwing teacups and screaming.
It is tough when you don't play for a while and a couple of games go by when, you've worked hard to be ready, but then aren't involved.
I'm not really one who goes telling people things. I'm quite a reserved character and I keep a lot of things to myself. That's my home life as well. I just try to deal with things and, rightly or wrongly, get on with it.
But I still think it's part of the skill of being a coach or manager - to know who responds to what. And some players do respond to a rollicking. If it needs to be done, you have to do it. As a player, that wasn't necessarily me.
Growing up as a kid, I played for Wallsend Boys Club, a famous boys club. I had such a good childhood and upbringing there.