What I really learned in the army was how to be a pacifist.

Somehow I managed 2014 to be 60 in the world.

You show me a family, I'll show you dysfunction.

'The Rachel Maddow Show' is a piece of sleight of hand presented as a cable news show. It is TV entertainment at its finest.

No matter how I do this, my best songs have profanity in them.

I'm kind of a feel player. I'll stretch out before a show a bit and do some playing, but that's about it. I'm not one of these 10-hour-a-day playing guys.

I don't do 'Image' magazine or high-fashion shows.

RuPaul's Drag Race' is my favorite TV show.

There's a lot to be said for loafing if you know how to do it gracefully.

I really underestimated how many people are paying attention to 'Jeopardy' and what's out there.

I am inspired by show girls and Vegas. I was a cabaret performer, so that's where all that influence comes from.

I don't do the same show on any two nights.

I've had to learn how to say 'no' to offers.

The classical writers... playwrights, Jacobean, Elizabethan playwrights, all showed areas of all classes and how they live and painted them pretty authentically.

I love HBO's 'Girls.' I like that show a lot.

I'd done an Edinburgh show before, in 1981, called 'The Importance of Being Varnished' - I was in the pun trade at the time.

It's unbelievable how far my career has taken me.

I might be out of the league if I didn't have a guy like K.G. to show me the ropes and a coach like Doc Rivers.

How come there's only one Monopolies Commission?

Well, I play Jews and parrots. Parrots are how I've branched out.