I'm sorry, but there is absolutely no reason why bacon envelope glue should exist, let alone be so popular that it's sold out.

If aliens are really hanging out in our 'hood, it's hard to imagine any other fact more worthy of study. If not, then why does such a large fraction of the populace insist on believing they're here?

When your outlet is taken away from you, when your catharsis is stripped from you and you don't understand why, and you're so disappointed, and you're so blindsided by it, it hurts.

Grown-ups yell. I don't know why, but they do.

I'm used to explaining to people why my jokes were funny.

I'm an example of why people deserve second chances.

I can't even believe that in 2018, I still have to lay out why diversity in anything matters.

Maybe we ought to consider a Golden Rule in foreign policy: Don't do to other nations what we don't want happening to us. We endlessly bomb these countries and then we wonder why they get upset with us?

They're like, 'Oh, you did a...' and I'm like, 'I did a what?' No, I flipped twice. I twisted twice. They go, 'It's called a...' and I'm like, 'Why do I need to know that? I just need to go and do that.'

It's all about the vibes. That's why it's called 'Vibras' in Spanish.

I like to write and that's why I write. I don't think about how much the book will sell.

I stopped beating up on myself. I stopped asking myself why I didn't sell this number of records, why I don't have corporate sponsorship. I just don't buy into any of that anymore.

Why do we never expect dull people to be rascals?

I don't understand why every guy is not a romantic. I enjoy it.

It's the ingredients you choose (Chorizo? Sure! Rye bread? Why not?) that will make your stuffing stand out.

I think I'm a writer, and it's my job. People in other professions are expected to do their jobs all the time. Why shouldn't I?

I can't understand why a person will take a year to write a novel when he can easily buy one for a few dollars.

I don't have the desire to just keep every record and put it out. That's not what I do. I make records for people; that's why I just continue to be consistent, where a lot of the other top writers, they kind of fell off because they started focusing on their own careers as artists. That's not where my head is at.

I'll tell you why, I don't invite the ones I don't like.

I get creeped out by Francis Bacon's paintings, and I can't say exactly why. They're all really disturbing, and there is an almost nimbus-like quality behind some of his frightening characters and stuff.