Comedian

There are talented people along the way, although very few come to mind. They're not very daring. Part of the problem is that comedians don't want to overthrow anything. They want to join it.

I was always biting the hand that fed me. It was compulsive. Kennedy was very good to me, and I attacked him as soon as he was elected. I attacked him before he was elected.

I used to go to two movies every week for the Saturday matinee when I was a kid.

When people write comedy from neutrality, it just gets kind of silly.

My humor was Victorian - and still is.

Washington couldn't tell a lie, Nixon couldn't tell the truth, and Reagan couldn't tell the difference.

I dare say that if most comedians today, the gifted ones, were to sit down and write, they'd learn more about their craft. But what happens is they get out there before they learn what their viewpoint is, if any.

I didn't think that anything is beyond humor - not profane humor, but a good, honest approach to humor.

A conservative is someone who believes in reform. But not now.

My life needs editing.

I'm a radical, and I always have been.

Reagan won because he ran against Jimmy Carter. If he ran unopposed he would have lost.

Comedians have to challenge the power. Comedians should be dangerous and devastating - and funny. That's the hardest part.

I was a writer. I couldn't sell anything, and the comedians were among the dumbest people I had ever met. They'd all say to me, 'The average man won't understand it.' You know, they're superior to the average man.

Reagan won because he ran against Jimmy Carter. If he ran unopposed he would have lost.

Professional comedians, surprisingly, have a lack of humor. They're insensitive to the insanity of our times.

I was on stage last night, and I gave a medical report about Donald Trump. I said he was hospitalized for an attack of modesty.

Too much comedy today is vulgar, not clever. I say that as a comedian and as a consumer.

I was afraid no one would laugh, and I wanted to pretend I wasn't noticing the audience. I didn't want the audience to get the idea I was telling a joke and waiting for a laugh.

There's a great feeling of powerlessness in America. When I express ideas to people, they say, 'That's terrific, but do you think it really counts?'