Poet

If life must not be taken too seriously, then so neither must death.

The three most important things a man has are, briefly, his private parts, his money, and his religious opinions.

It is our less conscious thoughts and our less conscious actions which mainly mould our lives and the lives of those who spring from us.

God and the Devil are an effort after specialization and the division of labor.

When you've told someone that you've left them a legacy the only decent thing to do is to die at once.

Persahabatan seorang pria, seperti wasiatnya, dibatalkan oleh pernikahan - tetapi mereka juga tidak kurang dibatalkan oleh pernikahan teman-temannya.

Opinions have vested interests just as men have.

Karakter paling nyata dari kebodohan adalah kesombongan dan kebanggaan pada kecongkakan.

A hen is only an egg's way of making another egg.

We shall never get people whose time is money to take much interest in atoms.

The oldest books are only just out to those who have not read them.

Evil is like water, it abounds, is cheap, soon fouls, but runs itself clear of taint.

Man is the only animal that laughs and has a state legislature.

To die is but to leave off dying and do the thing once for all.

Silence and tact may or may not be the same thing.

A virtue to be serviceable must, like gold, be alloyed with some commoner, but more durable alloy.

If God wants us to do a thing, he should make his wishes sufficiently clear. Sensible people will wait till he has done this before paying much attention to him.

People care more about being thought to have taste than about being thought either good, clever or amiable.

Marriage is distinctly and repeatedly excluded from heaven. Is this because it is thought likely to mar the general felicity?

Nobody shoots at Santa Claus.