I wish my name was Brian because maybe sometimes people would misspell my name and call me Brain. That's like a free compliment and you don't even gotta be smart to notice it.
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Spaghetti... I can't eat spaghetti, there's too many of them. No matter how hungry I am, 1,000 of something is too many. I'll have 1,000 pieces of noodles.
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I wear a necklace, cause I wanna know when I'm upside down.
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A severed foot is the ultimate stocking stuffer.
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My sister wanted to be an actress, but she never made it. She does live in a trailer. She got halfway. She's an actress, she just never gets called to the set.
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I like to play blackjack. I'm not addicted to gambling. I'm addicted to sitting in a semi-circle.
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If I had nine of my fingers missing I wouldn't type any slower.
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I wish I could play little league now. I'd be way better than before.
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I'm against picketing, but I don't know how to show it.
