Writer

I believe in only one thing: liberty; but I do not believe in liberty enough to want to force it upon anyone.

Democracy is also a form of worship. It is the worship of Jackals by Jackasses.

No matter how long he lives, no man ever becomes as wise as the average woman of forty-eight.

In the duel of sex woman fights from a dreadnought and man from an open raft.

A prohibitionist is the sort of man one couldn't care to drink with, even if he drank.

It is not materialism that is the chief curse of the world, as pastors teach, but idealism. Men get into trouble by taking their visions and hallucinations too seriously.

Man is a beautiful machine that works very badly.

Let's not burn the universities yet. After all, the damage they do might be worse.

The worst government is often the most moral. One composed of cynics is often very tolerant and humane. But when fanatics are on top there is no limit to oppression.

The only really happy folk are married women and single men.

Marriage is a wonderful institution, but who would want to live in an institution?

The only cure for contempt is counter-contempt.

Man is always looking for someone to boast to; woman is always looking for a shoulder to put her head on.

The most dangerous man to any government is the man who is able to think things out... without regard to the prevailing superstitions and taboos. Almost inevitably he comes to the conclusion that the government he lives under is dishonest, insane, intolerable.

On some great and glorious day the plain folks of the land will reach their heart's desire at last, and the White House will be adorned by a downright moron.

It is hard to believe that a man is telling the truth when you know that you would lie if you were in his place.

Time stays, we go.

I believe that it is better to tell the truth than a lie. I believe it is better to be free than to be a slave. And I believe it is better to know than to be ignorant.

Every decent man is ashamed of the government he lives under.

No matter how happily a woman may be married, it always pleases her to discover that there is a nice man who wishes that she were not.